Friday, June 19, 2009


Ok. Well.
I havent blogged in a while. Well. Only a week. But It seams a while to me!
So. Surprise surprise another fight has occured. You know what I wish? I wish that the two groups could have originally been friends and then we found each other like this year and then were like: oh hey there, lets be friends eh? 
But. What could be expected?
We are, like, the most dramatic people ever.
And to show how sad I am I am not using colours for this post
Song: Seasons of Love

Now, I am going to write to each person in like a paragraph. And I am not sorry for what I say, because thats me. I am blunt. Some try and protect their friends by lying, and say I am too straight forward. But I treat others how I would like to be treated, and in an ideal world, it would only be honesty. Well, apart from the odd white lie because. Well, you get what I mean. Ok to kick start it off I think I will go from who I am most madestest at to who i am the the least madestestest at. Yee? 

Sabine: Well, what can I say? A lot is the answer. And it was retorical anyway so shut up. I truly wish that we had met this year, when the big group had never existed, that the slate could be wiped clean. But, we all have to face our mistakes, so yeah. And I am not sorry for this. Because this is how I feel. I don't even care if you read this or not. And before you say I am being hypocritical for not doing this to your face, its because I cant seem to find the words when I need them, so maybe I will print this off and THEN say it to your face? Or something. But it is not because I am to scared. BELIEVE ME. So Sabine. God you piss me off. When it is your fight everyone must be completely serious and stay up and on msn as late as necessary, but when it is someone elses, who cares, huh? And Laura was only trying to reconect the groups, because she misses some of the people she loves, and you know what? If she wanted to rejoin the groups, and you guys were as close as you say you were you would have cared enough to make an effort. But instead you send her back with my scissors when it would have taken you what? I minute to put them back in my locker. And even when she was CRYING, NO ONE in your group went to comfort her. I GET that you were mad. I get that. But I couldnt just SIT there and watch one of my closest friends cry, and then make her cry more. I couldnt do that. And you always overeact when someone breaks a promise or tells a secret. People forgive YOU straight away, but you take like 5000000 years to forgive someone, and you always hold it against them. Ok? And when the group is talking, sometimes you have to CONTRIBUTE. Scary I know, but it does happen. And I just wish that you would think about other people rather than yourself all the time. It is always about you. Always. Why arent you watching my videooo? Because we dont. want. to. And today, you just gave up on the fight. Like you dont WANT to be friends with anyone but your group. Its just so UNFAIR! And you know what? I could LIST the times that my group has bitched ok? 1. Today, all day 2. Every like 2nd Tech class 3. In like passing like: "argh mary is pissing me off" "yeah, poor catti." END OF CONVERSATION 4. when we went off and "keck" started. 5. Umm...I honestly think that is it, but if anyone from keck reads this please add if you do remember. k? And how it always has to be directly taken from something or it is not real. It can be. IMPLIED. Or an action might have shown it. It doesnt HAVE to be in words.

Bec: I am not really PISSED at you. More like...confused. I mean, we actually do get on really well. Maybe Celine Dion helps with that. =) But seriously, just in fights you just annoy me. Its like, you have never actually shared ANYTHING, its not just wanting to know everything, its more like...i cant feel like im really your friend when I dont know ONE peice of information about you thats not really like open to everyone outside the "group". Like.... it's just ME, but also I cant like really be anything more that like  a casual friend to you because...i dont know how else to explain this... i have a "peice" of you. Sounds weird, and could easily be turned dirty or WEIRD, but its like....argh. I don't know. And I just get SO annoyed at your group, because It just seems like your so BITCHY towards each other, and I just couldnt be in a group like that. I don't know, I will always be amused with you... maybe that is all it will ever be.. just a casual friendship, not a close-ish one. I just can't pinpoint you at all. I just cant like work out WHAT you are like. Ill come back to that =)

Mary: Your just so CONFORMING to other people's expectations, what they THINK you are like. But I just cant....maybe it is because I have known you the longest. But we have a $15 (EACH) bond =). I dont think anyone will ever understand. Me and Mary have a fight every 3 days, and yet we still pull it together, and although we always never FULLY get over it.  Its just, I dont see HOW you can just PRETEND your way through life. Its just so confusing for me. I know that you know that I know that I can never trust you with certain things but with other things I can (*cough cough*). I can never REALLY get mad at you. So this is really hard for me to write this. I just WANT to get mad at you becuase you are basically everything I hate in a person: spoilt, follow the crowd, always try and please people. But then you are everything  I love in a person to. Why are you so confusing missy? I just want to see you be completely selfish for one day. And not think about what ANYONE will think. I am going to be honest, I did think and say that I thought that you might be jelous, because you always go on about wanting guy friends, and know we have them. But, maybe I was wrong, maybe your still not being yourself and telling me.  I can still say is that I can imagine us as 76 year olds arguing about what is better: The Cure/Taylor Swift. I know my answer. =)

Laura: Laura, all you ever wanted was to get the two groups back together. Your still a fucking lying bitch to me. That was uncalled for, slightly. You seem to at the same time HATE ME and lie all the time and piss me off, but then your just so darn cute and defensless I want to give you a massive hug. You do piss me off, I piss you off. You lie, I tell the truth and you hate it. Its a loose loose situation. I just think, that I cant be with you when you and Mary are together, im not saying SPLIT UP or anythings. Its just we are all so different. And I can't go through a lesson without "bursting your bubble" because you seem so IDIOTIC. But.. aaahhh welll. We still laugh together, and I think you get why I get annoyed at you and I get why you get annoyed at me. So heer heer (that is like the cheering thingo heer heer! i dunno how to spell it). 

Kim: You and Kirstin are at the same but your name is alphabetacally first (i think) so yeah. I hate seeing you cry. I HATE it. It makes me cry. I hate hate hate it. I love that you speak your mind, but at the same time are careful about how you do it. Of course we will get annoyed at each other, it was always going to happen. But i want you to know, I love you FOR your flaws. And I also want you to know that I dont want you to feel trapped in this "bffl" thing. Like with Sabine you felt like you couldnt get pissed, I don't want you to feel like that with our friendshipness. Like I know we won't be "bffls" for ever, but we will always be good friends. You know what? I dont think I could actually trust you any more than I do now. Ilovekimsheisabitchbutisthenicestbitchihaveevermet=) P.S Notify me when I am being a bitch because, frankly, I am dense. 

Kirstin: God, your so RATIONAL in these situations. It really is so infuriating. But you keep me calm, even when YOU are pissed. You make me very happy. And you are comfy to hug. You make me smile when you smile becuase you are so CLUELESS. I love how you take so long to decide things, and spend ages on saying goodbye. I would trust you with my whole world. I can't think of a fault of yours that I dont love, because you know what? We are friends. Forever. =)

I love how you understand about having AKON *shudders* on my iPod. You have no idea how MUCH they sing freaking Taylor Swift In Australia. Can I move to Sveedenland? I love that you stay back from fights and stick with the people you trust. And yeah. You are just really cool. And GROOVY. Plus I plan to yell at your dad to send you your iPod. 

Please post a section about me If you read this. If anyone was offended, I am not sorry. I was speaking my mind, and if you don't like me for me, then you really can just f*** off. Because I know who my real friends are, who could BECOME a real friend, who will always be just a friend. And nobody will ever be MORE than a friend. Cos that is just weird. I want you all to know, that I just feel like I need a BREAK from "the sex". I feel like I just need a breather from all of this and have a few days where no one is denying what is happening and I can just relax with "keck". That is just how I feel. Comment with how you feel? Thanks. So anyway. Yeah, I think we should all just take a BREATHER. Sort out our own problems, come back, discuss it if we want. And Yeah. 

btw. I need colour. I love keck. I would trust them with my world. Elli come back!

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